As I lay here with my child in my arms, his little face tucked into my neck and his arms wrapped around my body, I breathe in. A deep long breath.
I take in the smell of his sweat skin.
I can feel the warmth of his breath on my cool skin.
I watch his little chest go up and down as his heart beats away
If only time could stand still. In this moment right now, I am at peace
I could watch him sleep forever, I wonder what he dreams?
My love for him so pure and so painful
I want to protect him of all sadness in this world, to keep him in a little bubble and for him to never experience hurt
I watch the corners of his pink lips raise, as if he is smiling
Oh, how my heart aches!
I feel my eyes begin to well up, tears are flowing from my eyes and down my cheeks
I taste the saltiness of a tear that has landed onto my lips
My heart skips a beat as In this moment, right now, I could not love him anymore than I do
I see innocence and beauty
I no longer feel the stress of every day life, I just feel complete
In this moment it’s easy to forget all the upset and bad that is happening around us
It’s easy to forget my illness
As a Mum, I only have one job and that is to raise and protect my children
I remember the first moment he was placed into my arms and how precious he was
My heart beats for him
I wipe away a tear from the corner of my eye and breathe in the moment
I place my finger on his cheek and run it gently, as not to wake him, along his face towards his ear
His skin is soft and warm to touch
I cherish these moments, storing the memories in my heart
I will not always be around for my boy but I hope that he knows that wherever he is, I will always be with him in his heart
