Dealing with Child Tantrums

Oliver is 17 months old and having a tantrum isn’t new to him, he has been throwing himself about for a few months now. He has learnt that if he doesn’t get what he wants just to throw himself on the floor like he is superman, arm out in front of him and he leaps to the floor. This i can deal with its what he does while he’s down there that I’m struggling with, he bangs his head on the floor and starts kicking out his legs! He can really hurt himself from doing this, i have learnt to ignore his antics as i feel that he is doing it because not only does he want attention but also as he thinks he can make his brothers laugh with his silly act.

His tantrum doesn’t last for long and after a minute of being ignored he soon gets up and carries on with what he was doing.

His bad behaviour doesn’t stop their though as he now pulls hair and has been known to bite his brothers bottom if he doesn’t get what he wants, he also has this horrible screeching scream that he has perfected to a tea as he knows that it really gets to me. When he pulls hair I say ‘Ouch’ to him so he knows that it hurts and when he climbs all over his brothers when they are playing with each other i make sure that they include him somehow in what they are doing. Oliver can say some words and understands a lot more and i know that it is easy for him to behave insuch a manner because he can’t talk yet, his tantrums and behaviour is a way of getting the attention from his brothers.

I know we must ignore this sort of behaviour and that it is probably a phase that he and many children go through so here are a few of my top tips on how to deal with tantrums for the young and older ones:

  • First and foremost Ignore their behaviour, walk away of possible.
  • Keep calm and collective, shouting will only make matters worse and possibly stress you out more
  • Try and take their mind off of what they are tantruming over with a new activity and by talking to them
  • Give your child lots of exercise and a chance to let off some of their steam outside or inside
  • Sit down and play with your child this will teach them to play nicely and also keep them entertained
  • Get down to your child eye level to talk to them calmly, sometimes holding on to them can calm them down, but not too tight and DO NOT shake them
  • Sometimes a count down can help like giving them 5 seconds to stop what they are doing, counting down 5 4 3 2 1…
  • Have a ‘Time Out’ spot, ours is on our bottom step but with young children you can just use a seat or even a piece of fabric placed onto the floor.
  • Our Time Out goes on their age so the eldest has 10 minutes to reflect on his behaviour and Joseph has 5 minutes, this may work with the older ones but not so well with the younger ones who do not understand
  • Sometimes the child only needs to a cuddle to help them calm down and gives them the attention they need, i don’t place them back down in the same place though once the cuddle is over i find something else for them to be doing or we sing nursery rhymes to the younger one
  • Saying ‘No’ doesn’t always work so explain what they are doing wrong and teach them the right way to behave
  • Remove your child away from the situation
  • Do not laugh at them however funny they look on the floor kicking away this will only, in my experience, increase their behaviour
  • Don’t ignore their feelings, give them some comfort. Spend some time in the day where you are together enjoying each others company as sometimes tantrums are just for attention from their parents or if they are jealous of other siblings receiving attention that they want

I am hoping that Oliver will grow out of his tantrums like his big brothers have done so once his communication and language improves and turn into a charming little man!

What advice do you have with dealing with tantrums, please share with me below? I am always looking for new ways to deal with every day child behaviour 🙂

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Olivers 16 Month Development

I haven’t done a development post for months now, i do believe my last one was when Oliver was 10 months old *shocking! hangs head in shame*. Oliver has learnt so much since then and is doing really well.

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Weight: 8.9kg, 19lb 9oz

Height: 72cm

Oliver loves his sleep and has slept through the night since he was 4 months old, unlike his older brothers who didn’t sleep at all, he goes to bed at 9.30pm and wakes at 7.00am. He does sometimes stir in the night especially when he is ill but a little cuddle to reassure him that Mummy is still around can soon soothe him back to sleep. He has a 45 minute nap in the morning at about 9.30 whilst he drinks his morning bottle of milk and then he has about an hour in the afternoon around about 3 o’clock. Sometimes depending on what sort of day he is having he can a few naps especially when he tires himself out by running around the park.

He likes to place his nappy in the bin but that now has extended to just about anything he gets his hands onto. Our bin is a Brabantia 30l push down lid one which he has just learnt how to open the lid up so now it is fun to put everything in it and he even closes the bin lid too. Today i found a puzzle box, 2 moshi monsters, a packet of crafts and a tuperware lid in there.

He likes to interact with other children and shows interest in what other children are doing especially is older brothers when they are playing with Lego or Moshi Monsters. Oliver really enjoys soft play areas as he likes to throw himself around and he knows that he can do little damage to himself there, he loves to run through tunnels and go down slides. He takes delight in running around and can sometimes just run from one end of the room to the other and find this hilarious whilst he is doing it.

He doesn’t like the word ‘No’ but what child does! lol His bottom lip comes out when he is told off and then the crying comes.

He doesn’t really play with toys as such but what he does do is place items into boxes and transfers them from one place to another area. He likes to pick up moshi monsters collectibles and put them into a tin and then he empties them out and does it again. He lines his cars up and likes to push his trolley around the house with his goods that he has collected along the way.

His favourite Song is ‘Twinkle Twinkle’ to which he does all the actions to even down to making the triangle perfectly with his little fingers. We have been singing quite a few nursery rhymes and he loves the ones with actions that he can follow along with.

He knows when he has had enough food as he nods his head from side to side and says No. He nods his head in agreement when he notices something he wants and says ‘me me’.

He gets excited when he recognises someone he knows and gives them a great big smile.

Oliver  enjoys carrying out small tasks and claps himself once he has done. He understands simple sentences like ‘throw the ball’ and knows how to react when i say ‘Where is your ball’ as he goes searching for it.

He loves to read books and can turn the pages, looking at the words and pointing to the pictures. He likes the story the Gruffalo and Giraffes can’t Dance.

Oliver now feeds himself pretty much every feed time, when he is hungry he points to his lunch box which he takes to his childminder and when he wants a drink he goes and stands in front of the sink and cries. He is just starting to drink from a normal cup and doesn’t really spill any of it, although i don’t really fill it up that much just in case lol. He puts his arms up into the air when I am undressing him and taking his tops off and can easily take his own trousers off. Oliver is also beginning to take off his nappy when he has done a wee. I have attempted a few times to place him onto a potty and he has done his business in it a couple of times, at first he cried when i put him on but now he actually goes and sits on it himself. So i shall begin to potty train him properly soon.

He uses different types of everyday words like, apple, birdie, ball, book, bottle and mine. He is starting to out two words together e.g. my mummy, in bin, me want.

He recognises himself on the Cow and Gate advert and whenever he hears the music he runs up to the TV and laughs pointing out himself.

He enjoys playing with little people and matches parts of objects that fit together like putting the lid back on a container. He likes to move the train around the train track and makes noises while doing it.

His favourite Show on TV at the moment is NumTums on CBeebies and Alphablocks, he loves numbers and letters and gets really excited and squeals with delight when it is on.

He is beginning to start to jump with two feet and enjoys jumping on the trampoline.

His favourite food is Pasta Bake and yoghurt.

I am looking forward to teaching Oliver some more actions to some more nursery songs and i will be listening out to him using some more words and extending his vocabulary.

Hopefully next month will see his first hair cut and the beginning of potty training.

Thank you for reading my post:-)

Make my day and comment below 🙂

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