A couple of years ago I passed my driving test, on the 26 November 2009 at 10:24 to be exact. I took my lessons like most teenagers do when i turned 17, I enjoyed driving around and couldn’t wait to put in for my test. After a few months i filled out the form and passed it onto my instructor to put in for me, I was due to start university so i was hoping to be driving in my own car before i left home. Unfortunately the company i took my lessons with went bankrupt and i didn’t end up taking my test, I moved up to Boston, Lincolnshire to start my fashion course at university and made do with travelling back and forward to home by coach and trains. I decided to wait until my course was over and just focus on university before putting in for my test again, it wasn’t just the time i didn’t have to spare but it was the cost of the lessons, being a student living away from home meant i had to keep an eye on my budget and count my pennies, I wouldn’t be able to afford to drive anyway.
Years went by and i still hadn’t taken my test until 2009 at the age of 31, I eventually decided it would be best for myself and the family to take some more lessons and learn to drive. I am not a very confident person and was very nervous and felt anxious and uneasy about learning to drive so I found myself a lovely lady instructor, who was very nice and understanding. I had been involved in an accident about 7 years ago where a truck had ploughed into my mum’s car on the motorway and took us along the central reservation, apart from whiplash and nightmares we got away lightly but it has made me become a nervy passenger and i flinch when a vehicle gets too close to the car and i don’t think it has helped me with my confidence in driving. I was scared at first getting into the driving seat but it all seemed to come back to me what i had learnt all those years ago. the thought of driving really scared me but after explaining my fears to my instructor she said i was a good driver and i would eventually overcome them the more and more i get behind the wheel, i could only become an experienced driver with practice. She told me about an herbal remedy that i could take prior to getting in the car, its called Rescue Remedy by Bach, it helps to restore your inner calm, control and focus and is really good in stressful everyday situations. I bought the drops and they did seem to help ease and calm my nerves. Luckily i passed my test the first time, which made me feel very proud of myself. I did get 6 fault points but they were because my legs were shaking so much that i couldn’t control the clutch on my reversing round the corner manoeuvre.
Now two years on after passing my test i still dread driving, i get all sweaty, my hands become clammy, my legs become weak, I can’t breathe and I become all dizzy. When i know i have to drive anywhere, I start to shake and become quite tearful. I have to plan my route before i get in the car, making sure that i don’t have to drive around busy roundabouts or pull out onto busy A roads. If i know I am driving somewhere the next day I won’t be able to sleep that night because i will be worrying. Once I’m actually driving I’m not too bad, i do sweat and my heart beats ten to the dozen but I don’t think I’m too bad of a driver. I am very cautious driver but I think it’s because I have three children to think about and I’m scared that if i am in accident and they get hurt then it would be my fault, I know that i shouldn’t think like that but I can’t help myself, I’m not scared for the safety of myself but that of my children’s.
Whenever I drive somewhere and I have my eldest boy in the car he always says to me “well done mum, see you’re a good driver” but the thing is i can’t see it all i know is other drivers bib me all the time for not being fast enough or not pulling away from the lights quick enough, I’ve been called names, been threatened and had drivers up my back side trying their best to get passed me. I have never caused any accident and always drive at the national speed limit and to be honest even over the limit most of the time (not too much though)
What can I do to help myself become a more confident driver?
Do you suffer the same as me and if so what do you do?
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