I am Scarred, I am Here, This Is Me!

For the past year and a half I have been living with a Colostomy due to treatment for Bowel Cancer.

I have never been a very confident person and will often hide behind my children when it comes to being social.

I shy away from confrontation and hide my body behind clothes that are not figure hugging.

Learning to live with my stoma has been hard. Learning to accept how my body has become has been a journey. I am still not fully confident with myself, but I took the first big step a few days ago. That was, to share a picture of me in a bikini (not a high-waisted one) on a couple of my social media outlets.

I was worried that people would reject me and call me hideous but I needed to do it for myself.

Recently, the blogging community had been shocked with the sudden death of a highly respected blogger. Her main motto was to live for the day, her approach to life was honest and carefree. She was bold, caring and funny. I didn’t know the Kate but I had seen her at events that I had been to and followed her on Twitter, where I got to read about her dating exploits. This week, a huge following of bloggers shared photos of themselves, on social media, in their bikinis. Kate’s tips on getting your body bikini ready was to simply just wear one!

My facebook and Instagram feed quickly became full of beautiful ladies of all ages sharing their bikini bodies. I became inspired to share mine.

If everyone else could, then why couldn’t I?

I first shared the picture on the blogs facebook page and then on Instagram. I was worried about receiving negative comments, but in fact I received some lovely comments of support and encouragement.

You see, I see my body as hideous. Ugly. Gross. A monster hidden beneath the clothes.

I want to be accepted, even though I am different.

I want people to know but I don’t want to be ridiculed.

I don’t want people to stare at my tummy, scanning over my clothes looking for where my stoma is.

I am quite anxious talking about my stoma and letting new friends know about it. I don’t want to be treated differently.

But, I shouldn’t be feeling like this. I should be proud that I am still here. Still alive.

Beauty isn’t just about having a perfect body with no imperfections or having a pretty face. It’s about having a pretty soul, a good heart and a strong mind.

So with Kates ‘this is me- take it or leave it’ attitude I share with you all now how I look today

This is my F**K You Cancer Jump

Never stop believing in yourself!

 

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I’m Going to Britmums Live

This weekend will see me leaving the house early in the morning at about 7:30 all on my own! Yes you heard right i have been given a mummy release card (i get one a year) and I will heading off in to London for the famous UK’s biggest social media conference and blogger event, where lifestyle bloggers and social influencers gather together to socialise, meet new brands, improve our skills and network Oh and did i forget to say their is tea and cake available. Now i may have to warn you prior to attending that if their is somewhere i can tantalise my tastebuds with either wine or cake then i will be there.

The conference starts on Friday but i will not be able to attend on that day as i will be watching my eldest boy Jak perform in the English National Opera Death in Venice, his performance starts at 7:30! I am so looking forward to watching him on that huge stage, no he’s not singing, he’s just doing some background acting but i probably will be the most proudest person in that theatre the moment he enters on stage.

Back to Britmums….

So i will only be in attendance on saturday but i will make most of the day with trying my best to sit in on as many talks as i can, i am particular looking forward to Innovative Blogging Models, Using your smartphone to create video, smartphone photography, LUNCH, writing reviews and sponsored posts (so much to learn) Blogging with heart, CAKE, Bloggers keynote. Goodness thats a lot in one day!

I do not have a sponsor although i did think about asking about but decided against it.

I am not a very confident person and find it hard to approach people so here i am introducing myself prior to the day

Name: Angela

Blog: The Three Musketeers Mumofthreeboys

Twitter ID: @angoewright78

Height: 5ft 2

Hair: Medium brown and straight

Eyes: blue

Is this your first blogging conference?

No, I attended britmums last year (must admit i was quite overwhelmed with it all, this year i know what to expect and also know a few more faces :-))

Are you attending both days?

No 🙁 just saturday

What are you most looking forward to at BritMums Live 2013?

Socialising, making new friends, chatting 

What are you wearing?

I have no idea, just something that i will be comfy in and that is probably not in the wash or on the ironing pile.

What do you hope to gain from BritMums Live 2013?

I would like to learn some new tips, new friendships

Tell us one thing about you that not everyone knows

I once got so drunk i had to crawl home as i couldn’t stand up, even a cab turned me away

Looking forward to meeting you all there 🙂

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This is Me!

 

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