Cancer is lonely
No matter how much support you have around you
No matter how many people offer you help
You always feel lonely
You try to keep strong for everyone else around you. For your family, for your friends and especially for your children
You try to hold it all together
You tell people that you are fine
But you are not!
Family and friends love you, they offer help and visit you when they can
But they do not understand how lonely cancer can be
I cry
I cry when I am alone, in fact I sob
I have no control over the tears, they sometimes just roll down my cheeks and I have no control over them
I am jealous of others and their future
Why me?
I Live in fear every second, every hour of every day
Of what the future holds for me
Your emotions are all over the place
Like a rollercoaster, they are up and down
No one understands
How can they?
Words go in but you are not listening
Your mind wanders
Having Cancer you feel isolated
The treatment is gruelling and tiring
You have a good support network but they can not go through your emotions and treatment with you
You alone are in the radiotherapy machine
You alone are laying on the bed waiting for surgery
You alone are recovering from surgery
You alone feel the pain, the tiredness, the sickness and the fatigue
Cancer is a lonely path
No one should walk alone, but Cancer has a way of making you feel lonely
Sending you lots of love and hugs. This is lovely xxx