A letter to my loved ones, part 1

To my first born

You are my eldest boy and at 9 years old sometimes I forget how young you are because of your maturity and at times you act so grown up.
You are such a loving, caring, sensitive boy who loves to have a cuddle and is not afraid to show affection. You are the best big brother anyone could ask for and take on that role brilliantly and perfectly. I feel sorry for you as I rely on you too much, I am always asking you to look after your brothers, help tidy up their mess and help feed them too. Its become the norm for you to get your little brother a drink at dinner time and get him dressed for school in the morning that now you do it without asking. You have never argued with me or answered me back and you always trying to do your best at pleasing me.
The first time I saw you, I couldn’t believe that I had produced such perfection, you took my breath away. I had this sudden rush of love for you, a love that I had never experienced before. I just wanted to hold you close to me all the time and protect you, I was worried that somehow you would be taken from me. Holding you in my arms was the best moment ever, I felt warm and needed, like I eventually had a purpose in life.
You had big blue eyes, a little button nose and black hair with little curls, you was so gorgeous.
You was so perfect, so tiny, so fragile I just couldn’t believe that you was mine. My heart ached with the love I had for you.
You never liked to sleep and kept us awake all night long, fighting your tiredness, running round in circles until eventually you would scream yourself to sleep. You never slept much throughout the day either, you was very knowing and loved getting attention from everyone, you would give your biggest smile to anyone that looked at you, the smile that melted my heart.
You loved your food, once you tasted it their was no stopping you, a Jaffa cake being your favourite you could fit a whole one in your mouth.
By the age of 2 1/2 you knew most of the model of cars there was just but looking at the logos. You would sit on the bus or in the car and recite every car that went by. You loved your cars, any cars would do. You would sit on the floor and line them all up in order of colour and size and model. I would sit and watch in amazement, once I moved one without you knowing just to see what your reaction would be, you knew straight away that something was wrong and you placed the car back in it’s rightful place.
I always knew you was going to be clever.
You bring happiness to everyone who knows you, their is not a bad bone in your little body. You will do anything for anyone, a truly remarkable boy, an inspiration to me and many others.
Your little brothers look up to you. You always have time for them, playing, cuddling, and reading with them and mummy, well I love you so much, I am so blessed to have you in my life. You are why I wake up in the morning, why I breathe and you fill my days with love and laughter.
I love you with all my heart and I am very proud of you, I know you are going to grow up to be such a handsome, caring man just as you are a boy.
Love Mummy x x

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