2017 Please Be Kind To Me

Dear 2017,

Last year was not a very good year to many people, me included. 2016 was pretty shit, to put it lightly.

Many people lost their lives through illnesses or disasters in 2016. To be honest I didn’t spend much time watching the news or reading the papers about what was going on around me as I was in my own little nightmare.

This year I would like you to be kinder to me and my family, please.

We have been through so much and deserve just a little break.

2016 saw me being diagnosed with Bowel Cancer, adeno carcinoma, an unusual cancer for a young woman of my age to get. In fact it is rare and there are only two of us diagnosed with such cancer in the hospital that I received my treatment at.

Last year I under went 5 and a half weeks of radiotherapy and taking chemotherapy tablets.

Last year I spent 8 days in hospital with an internal infection due to the radiotherapy harming my bladder and bowel.

Last year I had my tumour taken away (well what was left of it).

On top of everything that I went through in the space of 5 months, you decided that you would throw a little more at me.

After my first surgery, I had complications and just 2 weeks later I had to have an emergency operation on my small bowel.

You see 2016, I am stronger than what you think I am.

In 7 months I went through hell and back, physically and emotionally. Not only did I suffer but it effected family and friends.

So this year, 2017, I would like you to take into account on what I went through last year and take pity on an underweight Mummy who just wants to be here for her children.

I would like to laugh again. A real good belly laugh.

I would like to be fear free.

I would like to spend precious time with my boys without thinking about time.

2017, I would like to be left alone please. Let me be. Allow me to be who I want to be.

I want to have tears of happiness. I want the tears to roll down my face and onto a smile

I don’t want any more sadness or bad news. I want to be hopeful.

Dear 2017, please be kind to me.

Much Love

A very tired, but hopeful Angela

Happy National Popcorn Day 19/365

Who doesn’t need an excuse to kick off your slippers, put your feet up, lay back on the sofa, popcorn in one hand and a good film on the box. Well…..

Today, 19th January is National Popcorn Day

So you can do just that!

I went a bit different with my popcorn and had it with vanilla ice cream, maple syrup and chocolate sprinkles. My goodness it tasted good

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It had everything you needed in a quick snack. Sweetness from the syrup, cold from the ice cream, crunch from the chocolate, saltyness and heat from the popcorn.

Go on try it!

 

Raising a thoughtful boy 18/365

I have mentioned many times before how thoughtful and caring my eldest boy is. All three of my boys are but because of the eldest age it means he can do so much more than his you get siblings.

He has a beautiful soul and not a bad bone in his body. Never a bad word said about anyone and always wanting to help.

Today, he picked his you get brother up from school, cooked everyone dinner, went out for a 3 mile run, washed up and then ran me a lovely bubble bath. When he called me upstairs I noticed the bathroom light was out. He had little a candle for me and placed the lightbox on the window sill with a message ‘Get well Mummy’


This boy will go far as a male adult.

Nacho Nacho day 17/365

I found some tortilla wraps in the back of the freezer this morning. So once defrosted, which didn’t take longer  I made some nachos from them.

It’s so simple and easy to do.

Cut the wraps into half, then half again and half again. You should get 12 from each wrap.

Sprinkle on some olive oil and any seasoning that you desire. I added turmeric and paprika to the olive oil and brushed it on them.

Place onto a baking tray and bake for about 5-10 minutes. Keep an eye on the. As they can burn pretty quickly. Turn them over half way through cooking.

Take them out of the oven when turning a golden colour.

Now your ready to add any dip of your choice. Houmous is a favourite in our house or just eat them on their own. A bit like a crisp.

No One Should Walk Alone

Cancer is lonely

No matter how much support you have around you

No matter how many people offer you help

You always feel lonely

You try to keep strong for everyone else around you. For your family, for your friends and especially for your children

You try to hold it all together

You tell people that you are fine

But you are not!

Family and friends love you, they offer help and visit you when they can

But they do not understand how lonely cancer can be

I cry

I cry when I am alone, in fact I sob

I have no control over the tears, they sometimes just roll down my cheeks and I have no control over them

I am jealous of others and their future

Why me?

I Live in fear every second, every hour of every day

Of what the future holds for me

Your emotions are all over the place

Like a rollercoaster, they are up and down

No one understands

How can they?

Words go in but you are not listening

Your mind wanders

Having Cancer you feel isolated

The treatment is gruelling and tiring

You have a good support network but they can not go through your emotions and treatment with you

You alone are in the radiotherapy machine

You alone are laying on the bed waiting for surgery

You alone are recovering from surgery

You alone feel the pain, the tiredness, the sickness and the fatigue

Cancer is a lonely path

No one should walk alone, but Cancer has a way of making you feel lonely

Cacao Nib Shortbread Recipe

This recipe of shortbread biscuits are quick and simple to make. With the light buttery sweetness they are ridiculously moorish. The classic recipe is so versatile, you can add in chocolate, ginger, lavender, lemon or even rosemary. I decided to add in honey and cacao nibs. It gives the biscuit a little crunch against the softness of the crumbly mixture

Shortbread is a favourite by everyone in our house. I cook up a batch and they dont’ last long. Everyone tucks in. They are soft and smooth with a little crunch from the nibs.

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Ingredients:

  • 120g Butter
  • 50g Caster Sugar
  • 200g Plain Flour
  • 2 Tbsp Organic Honey
  • 2 Tbsp Cacao Nibs

Method:

  • Preheat oven at 160
  • Mix in the butter with the sugar until creamy
  • Add in the cacao nibs and honey and combine well.
  • Add the flour in to the buttery mixture and rub them all together with your fingers. Don’t knead the mixture just pick it all up and press it into a ball with both hands.
  • I don’t roll out my dough. I just place it into the oven proof dish and push down with the palm of my hand and fingers. I like the uneven look on my biscuits.
  • Bake in the oven for 15 minutes. Keep an eye on the biscuits in the oven and remove when they become a little golden on the edges. You are hoping for a light golden colour.
  • Score the biscuits. Leave to cool. Cut the biscuits up into pieces. Now they are ready to serve.

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The horrors of Lego 16/365 

Black, blue, yellow and red,

Watch out where you tred.

Under the table, under the chair,

Lego pieces are everywhere.

Stand on one and you’ll let out a yell,

Be careful! Once I fell.

In the dark and in daylight,

The little bricks will put up a fight

Bruises, scratches and bumps will be there,

Lego pieces are everywhere.

Sharp bricks scattered across the floor,

From the front to the back door.

Watch out! Over there

Lego pieces are everywhere.